Part 1: The Past

              It's been a long month. Fuck, more like a year. I've changed as a person in 31 days. I've been reborn. It's an odd feeling, to think what I was doing not last year but last month. Last year I can deal with, last month was different. I find it doubly ironic that she would dye her hair pink after dumping me, as she knew I had dyed my hair pink in 8th grade. Furthermore, I find it ironic but oddly fitting that we haven't spoken since she said those 9 rather unsure words halfway through modern world. "I kinda think I'm gonna sorta break up with you." Somehow, I had imagined a more eloquent break-up from a creative writer who enjoys Tolstoy far more than she enjoys boys. Oddly fitting I say, because though our relationship was solid to all those looking in, we never talked about anything. I mean, yes of course we talked, we talked a lot. But the topics of conversation were rather trivial. One example would be foods you can eat with a shoelace:1 hour. we never talked about emotions or common interests outside of the internet, and we never opened to each other at all. It was like we only hung about each other because an imaginary string labeled "relationship" held us together. Meaningless, loveless, cold.
              And yet, we were fine. Better than most actually. For four months we did everything couples do. We hung out together and went with each other everywhere, we went on dates to cafes and romantic comedies. I even asked her out on a beach on the summer solstice at sunset, surprising even myself with how cheesy I could be. Objectively, we were a "cute" couple. Once, I said "I love you", I never got a reply.
         I should have known then that it was not meant to be. She broke up with me on our 4 month anniversary (one month ago), in Modern World, 12 hours after I met Kevin Spacey. The last words I said to her were "You have beautiful eyes." Then she dumped with the aforementioned 9 words and ruined my weekend. Hell, she ruined my week. For 5 days I thought she dumped me because of my haircut, for the next five, I couldn't speak in articulate sentences. I was in a bad place, depressed, confused, and overall melancholy beyond previous experience. Then, I was saved by a most unlikely source.

(SEE PART 2 FOR DETAILS)